Spherx
Megalomania
Through my essential leadership, I keep this ship moving… although I was in charge when our ship crashed… but that’s not important because I am the the leader. Everyone else will probably tell you I’m self-centered and egotisitcal, but they’re just jealous of my greatness. It was my idea to create this site based off of watching Bug discover what the internet was. Without the site, I’m sure we’d all be feral animals eating each other alive to survive on this strange planet of yours.
Idiot Chittix
Machine Guns & Feces
As far as we know, Idiot Chittix just wandered onto the site one day and he’s been working here ever since. He has no formal training in web development and is actually missing the whole frontal lobe of his brain. Yet somehow, he manages to impress us with a good idea now and then. Even if it takes a little sugar to get his creative energy flowing.
Patches
The Walking Undead
When we crash-landed on the planet, Patches was the only one who died from his injuries. We buried him and somehow, 3 weeks later he tracked us down to the warehouse and tried to eat our brains. Bug developed a serum to quell his hunger and Patches took to feeding off cinema instead.
Mac
Gluttony
Mac eats a lot. And I mean a lot! We call him Big Mac for obvious reasons. Rightfully so, Mac reviews restaurants across the galaxy for the website. He’s delighted about his new job, especially since the Domain has to pay his food bills. At least he’ll provide objective and useful reviews for our visitors. I hope his new profession doesn’t make him any fatter or else we’re gonna have to re-enforce the floors around the Domain. He must already weigh a metric ton! Hey? Where did my twinkies go?
Bug
Science & Tech
Very much is not known to the public about the universe in which we exist. Therefore we brought in our child genius, Bug, to explain it to you. Bug is ridiculously smart for a chittix and spends his time building inventions of useless degree. His helmet (or what he calls the Dimensionless Headshield) manages to house an unlimited expanse of anything imaginable. One time Bug had a spare tire available when our transport broke down. Oddly enough, he cannot produce a reasonable explaination for this phenomena even though he claims to be so intelligent. At least he’s on our side.
Quiphen
Sports
Quiphen has been brought onboard to cover sports. With football season around the corner, Quiphen will share with us his insights on the game and report final scores leading up to the big day in January. As you might have guessed, Quiphen loves sports of many kinds and involves himself in playing them. This means he takes quite a beating and, as you can see, Quiphen always seems to be wearing a bandage.
Cora
Tampons & Potpourri
I’m not sure why she was part of the crew to begin with but it probably had something to do with cleaning. After we started the website she begged me to let her contribute to the point where she started playing those little games like holding her breath until she turned blue if I didn’t give her a job. I told her she could do us all a favor and wear something nice.