Contrary to popular belief I do know how to use a human bathroom…Fuck you Cora for writing in the stall at Denny’s that I am a  hopeless creeper who likes to pee of the seats in the women’s bathroom…yeah…you know what else, I saw you do it as well!…I know that it was you because I was there watching you do it…and I am the creeper…How did this whole feud start you ask.  well it was about a month ago when I was playing around with Mac’s toy helicopter thingy when he came into his room holding a camera…I could not believe it!…I am a huge fan of Jackass and the like so we both came to the conclusion that we need to replicate some of the stunts on the show and also come up with some of our own…We locked Bug into the Port-o-potty, we duct-taped Spherx to his chair and flung him down a busy hill street, we video taped Cora peeing and then threw a fake baby covered in blood over the stall…it was nothing but comedy gold…gold!…but I guess the other ladies, Crazy psycho Cora included, did not really think that was funny and now I have to apologize by writing I am sorry notes in the stalls…to which was my own idea and and freaking great one at that!…So for the past week or so I have been dumping the trash in the ladies room and ever so often writing a poem or two on the stall wall…so far I think it is going well aside from Cora getting angry for all the trash being dumped in her room..

I was watching the news last night…yes I watch the news, asses…and there was this thing about how North Korea wants to bomb everyone…but one country, Japan, has decided to fight back…since I am a ninja(in training) I decided that I need to help my fellow countrymen with their problem…but how I wondered…I sat in my room for a while until I had the greatest idea…I would make my own missile that I could fill with tons of letters telling them not to bomb japan…but I guess, based on Bug’s suggestion that a rocket full of letters is in his words, “ A terrible Idea, what are you stupid?”…To which I replied, “I am not stupid Dad!”…and I ran out of the room crying…I have had more manly moments but I sat down again to try and think of  a new idea…Mac came by holding a camera that he was using to start his cooking show…”That’s it!”…I jumped up and told Mac that I wanted to create a commercial for the North Koreans that would explain in simplicity that they should not fire a rocket anywhere…so we put together a few ideas and sketched out some things that we could use to convey our message…It started with simply telling them they were bad, then warning them of their impending doom…All in all I think it will be successful…can’t fail right…

But a few weeks later the stupid idiots, myself excluded, fired another rocket claiming that they were sending a satellite into orbit…what I want to know is how they got enough money to make a satellite?…and who has enough money to use the signal coming from it…But Mac had a great idea and told me that we should use their technology against them and bombard them with propaganda of our own…we made many different types of things but ultimately came up with a new hero TV show for the NKs…We called him Captain Chef, and to bring him to life five people who carry special rings untie and then say the power that they are holding like this…

“Power of Fire for Cooking”

“Power of Skills for Cooking”

“Power of Tasting for Cooking”

“Power of Non-Poverty for Cooking”

“Power of Heart for Cooking”

They have to be said in that order and the last one has to be some flaming gay Asian guy who says it like he is saying it with gusto but really doesn’t care about anything…I think Bug would be a good candidate for this…All together they will unite and bring Captain Chef to life and he will cook and bring food to those poor, poor, poor, poor, poor, poor, poor, poor North Korean peoples…

I have done it and no one can take it away from me…I have finally found a group of people that I am going to blend in with and fuck you for thinking differently…See it all started when I was reading about cults on peoplewhomightbecrazierthanyoubutyoualsomightlike.com that I found a few videos of like minded people that seemed to have it all together…one was this kid with crazy good rap skills and other various people…One was this hilarious guy/girl who got mad at all the hate-in…So I looked into it further and I found a good documentary about a gathering of people who call themselves, The Juggalos…upon further inspection I found that these people all worship this rap band called Insane Clown Posse, or ICP for short…Man they are fucking nutso, and yet somehow they make sense to me…I decided to make my own rap video and join the club…Imagine my surprise when they all invited me to get drunk, drive trucks over cars(and fail at it hehehe), do some more drinking, stare at the weirdest boobs ever known to human kind, find the one black guy in the crowd, and in the end finish with kissing some guy in the closet…Great time, but the more I learned about the rap group the more I found that they might in fact be even more stupid than I am…I mean I am an idiot but I am not a fucking clown…then I found it…they wondered how magnets worked and I lost it…magnets…fucking magnets!!!…I just left the cult to find a smarter, better place to devote my life to…because I am not down with people who don’t respect science…I ended up back on peoplewhomightbecrazierthanyoubutyoualsomightlike.com looking for something else…So far I have found a kool-aid club, some weird mannequin place, and a place devoted to coprophilia…yuck, but enticing…if you don’t know what I am talking about here are some videos for you to see…